It started out as a good day. It felt as if I could take on the world, that nothing could affect me and I could withstand the emotional turmoil. To an extent, the day did seem promising too. But as night fell, it cast its shadow on my emotions as well.
I wish, I was strong willed, confident and optimistic. I wish, I could control my mind and cultivate a positive aura around me. I wish, I could stop my emotions acting like a pendulum and not lurch me in abyss of darkness. And, I wish I wasn’t such a naivete straight-talker, who believed in things on their face-value, either.
Each night, I am gripped with fear, fear of being surrounded by the darkness. There is no escaping the questions and doubts that constantly nag me. My mind is tired of playing out situations, of recalling the happy times and the unhappy ones as well.
I am struggling to keep faith too. There should be a guidebook on this. A key to pull out of this maize of misery. After all, haven’t most of us gone felt it too at some point? I wish…I wish, for things to become normal.